Sleepless nights, uncertainty, lack of purpose, thinking too much about the future…Â And you don’t even know what’s wrong!Â Oh yes, the much dreaded quarter-life crisis.Â I’ve been ranting about it on my blog since December just to let it out of my system and I’ve been depressed and it was dissappointing for me how I could see other people get affected by my dilemma. So to all my friends and loved ones who held my hand when I was feeling down – Thank you!
It’s that stage in your life where you’re too old to depend on anyone, but you’re not wise enough yet.Â I feel like I had no direction and I wasn’t going anywhere.
I’m sure I’m not alone in this.Â A few of my friends are also feeling this way.Â We even thought of seeking for professional help.Â When you think you need this, maybe you do need one and there’s nothing wrong asking for help with your problem.Â Even the big hollywood stars have their own therapists.Â Props to Demi Lovato who voluntarily admitted herself to a rehab facility – not because of drugs, but because of emotional issues.
And what is up with people asking me “when are you settling down?” Or “when are you going to get married?” It izzzz none of your business, trust me… asking me that question won’t make you rich… and it doesn’t help me neither >.<
I have always been happy when I dance.Â I have been a dancer since elementary and high school and at that early age, I had small gifts on my classroom desk from “fans” from the lower grade.Â Thinking about that always makes me smile.Â It’s one thing to have male fans, but to put a smile on a kid and inspiring them is a great feeling!Â I felt like I was Hannah Montana lol.Â (but she didn’t exist yet at that time) I danced pretty much everything: from hiphop to cheerleading, ballet, jazz and even Folk Dancing.Â We would compete in Literary NOPSSCEA competitions.
Good ‘ol days… But, one dance I don’t seem comfortable doing is anything with sexy moves @_@
College came and I danced for a year.Â I had to stop on my 2nd year for a very shallow reason.Â It was the year I turned 18 and allowed myself to have a boyfriend.Â I hated myself everytime I think about this.Â My boyfriend then (now my ex) didn’t want me to dance especially cheerleading because he doesn’t want other guys to see me dance and he doesn’t want guys to catch me when I do my stunts and stuff. >.<Â I was so immature and I don’t know why I found some logic to that… I vomit just thinking of it again.Â Girls, if your boyfriends bring you down from your crown, LEAVE THEM! They are no good for you!Â Surround yourself with people who allow you to grow as you wish.Â At that time, I also got busier with my Accounting course so I stopped.
Graduation day, I cried… because I didn’t get the award for “Dance” 🙁 and I looked back thinking I can’t bring back the years I stopped dancing.
Dancing makes me Happy
This year, I decided to follow my happiness and dance again!Â not only that, I dared myself to dance the only dance I don’t do… something sexy, something challenging!
I have been wanting to try this for so long.Â I just got caught up in my web of excuses because I was feeling down. My boyfriend supports me of course a 100%!Â All it takes is finally DOING IT!Â both excited and worried at the same time, I made my way to Polecats Manila at Gen Studios.
*photo credits to Kristel
I started Pole dancing mid April and I was so delighted to know that they will be having a recital!Â I signed up immediately because I wanted to feel the euphoria of dancing on the stage again – performing with a real audience!Â I found out that there are more benefits to joining Pole classes: new friends, great teachers, fun way of keeping fit and developing strength, I feel young again, I felt more confident – happy and wait a minute – I don’t feel down anymore.Â I have been Pole Dancing for a month and a half now and I completely feel great!
Is this an end to my QLC? I really do hope so.
I met miss Yoga Jane yesterday at an event and she told me she just saw my Pole Dancing recital photos.Â “Seems like you found the right thing for you”Â oh yes!Â I still think about my future sometimes, but I don’t worry anymore.Â From now on, I just keep on “DOING”
End your Quarter Life Crisis!
If you are going through this, here are a few tips based on my personal experience: (I am not a doctor nor an expert on this, it’s just my opinion)
1.Â Do the thing that keeps you happy and invest on it.Â It’s your hapiness, you deserve it!
2.Â Surround yourself with positive people, people who grow with you
3.Â Feed your mind with positive thoughts.Â Read books about personal help,
4.Â Avoid negative ideas.Â Avoid watching movies that doesn’t teach you anything especially horror, gory films that will only provoke fear and terror in your heart.Â Avoid people who put you down.Â When you’re undergoing QLC, you are more sensitive to even the littlest things.
5.Â Don’t sweat the small stuff. So what if you missed a deadline? So what if you failed at something? So what if you humiliated yourself for some reason.Â Who cares? You’re driving and someone cut on you – so what? it took away 2 seconds of your life.
Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff by Richard Carlson
It’s all about simple ways to keep the little things from overtaking your life.
One of the best books I’ve ever read that really helped me a lot!
6.Â Stay pretty!Â don’t forget to take care of yourself.Â Dress up, go to the gym, pamper yourself.Â Vanity is not a sin, Laziness (or sloth) is!Â If you don’t take care of yourself, you will just feel more horrible.
8.Â Keep healthy and fit.Â You might be clinically depressed and your body might lack the nutrients it needs.
9.Â Seek professional help if needed
10. Move on.Â It’s something that I learned from reading Miss J Alexander’s book “Follow the Model” No matter what happens, MOVE ON!
These tips are not only for my readers, but for me as well – as a reminder to myself how to keep moving on.Â Who knows, QLC is a biatch and it might come back, so I’m prepared with this!
Also, you might want to buy Meg’s June 2011 🙂 They had an article writen by Aileen E about Quarter Life Crisis.Â Also, I am in the pages of Meg’s June 2011 as one of the 25 young achievers they featured for their 13th anniversary issue!
Ending with a song from Bob Marley 🙂